A relationship filled resentment is one submerged in toxic one because by the very definition of the word itself, one gets the feeling of an atmosphere of negative vibes.
Even though it is usually the lowkey, muted form of acrimony and unhappiness, resentment should not be allowed in your relationship. This is because eventually, that muted displeasure will keep piling in your mind till it becomes too difficult to hold in. The months and months of unexpressed bitterness usually leads to emotional outbursts that may ruin things beyond reconciliation.
So it is important that partners should always avoid things that could lead to resentment, a well known poison to relationship happiness.
In order to successfully steer your relationship towards stability and happiness, here are five things to avoid, for they are some of the biggest causes of resentment in relationships.
- Not speaking your mind
As we have said here, it is dangerous to be the partner who never speaks his or her mind. Holding in your feelings, fears, unhappiness and the likes will only make things worse. Are you feeling some type of way about what your partner says or does to you, or some way they act in general which makes you uncomfortable? Speak up!
Refusal to do this might cause resentment to build in you, thereby affecting the balance of your relationship with them.
- Not being listened to
When your partner expresses their opinions and you ignore them, you make them feel worthless and unvalued. Guess what this results to… of course you guessed right… resentment!
And while a refusal to speak their mind may be on them, the fault will be yours if they do speak up but you never take their feelings into account.
- No appreciation
Everyone wants to feel valued, appreciated. Your partner falls in this category, too. She wants to hear about how much you value her. Your boyfriend also wants to feel like he counts, that his efforts are appreciated and that his presence counts and makes a difference in your life.
You need to let them hear these things. That reassurance is good for your relationship.
- Too many failed promises
When you consistently break promises made to the one you claim to love, it really does something awful to your relationship with them. If you can’t keep a promise, your partner will lose faith in you and that’s not good for your togetherness.
If you can’t keep a promise, don’t make it.
- Unmatched efforts
If one person keeps trying, keeps pushing for a better relationship, better communication, and better everything while the other doesn’t bother to even try, resentment will surely set in.
Being inconsistent, lackadaisical and complacent is not good for your relationship.